It’s Independence Day in the United States, which has us thinking: How important is independence in a relationship?
Well, it depends.
Relationships are like a dance. There are times when you feel drawn to your loved one and times when you feel the need to pull back and replenish your sense of autonomy.
The potential for conflict arises when partners’ needs fall on different ends of the spectrum. Some people desire more frequent connection, while others crave more independence.
Viewing your relationship as a dance rather than a tug of war will remind you to collaborate to meet each other’s needs rather than fight to preserve your own.
- The Dance Between Intimacy and Independence in Marriage
- Healthy Dependence as a Path Toward Healthy Relationships
- How to Avoid the Pursuer-Distancer Pattern in Your Relationship
The Relationship Minute from The Gottman Institute, dated 4 July 2019. You can sign up here to get it delivered to your inbox every Tuesday and Thursday morning.